The Chutney Manager

By virtue of hailing from Kerala, also known as land of coconuts, it is quite natural for us to have coconut in many of our dishes. Chutney or coconut dip is one of the most common dishes that is paired with famous breakfast items such as dosas and idlis. As was destined, last weekend, I decided to take a bold step in preparing a coconut chutney myself in combination with wheat dosa. It was an unusual attempt considering the fact that we have a master chef at home, in the form of my sweetheart.

As the established practice many novice chefs resort to, I searched and found a recipe online and followed the instructions. Since some of the ingredients were either unknown to me or not available, I decided to ignore them and managed with the rest. All went well except for the initial roasting of shallots which got slightly burned, or so I thought. At the end, the final product turned out to be so good that even the master chef was majorly impressed with the culinary skills of the rookie! Who knew, maybe the burnt shallots gave a smoky flavour to the dish, which might have added an accidental twist and tickled the tastebuds.

A few days later when the breakfast menu again had dosa and chutney, the master chef herself prepared it. A huge surprise awaited me, as soon as the dish was ready. The master tasted the dish she made and then bowed down to this humble being stating, she still felt the chutney I made last time was better than hers! I was in seventh heaven. What a glorified way of getting an appreciation. A tribute par excellence!

It didn't stop there. The liberal compliment was followed by the statement of the century. My sweetheart declared to the family that since Appa makes the best chutney in the house, henceforth, all days when chutney is on the menu, it will be Appa who will be the official chutney master.

Suddenly, I heard alarm bells going off. Warning lights flashed in dozens. Before I could even rush to a safe zone I was trapped in an impossible-to-escape dungeon. The name board of the place read, Death by Appreciation!

The only comparable experience in a corporate workspace is when a colleague or a boss showers you with compliments for a job well done, which in the first place was theirs to do. You will then be trapped to do similar or other jobs, the pain of which will be drenched in an avalanche of appreciation.

Allow me to dedicate this piece to all such 'true strategists' of the modern world. From this day, they will be known as The Chutney Managers!