The Bowl of Pilate

Claudia had been in labour for a few hours now. Word was sent to him that it was an unusually painful time for her. Pilate walked to the balcony of the court, feeling helpless while looking into the endless boundaries of Judaea, the province he ruled. It was not too long ago when he stood exactly at the same spot and assessed the agitating crowd which was getting even more restless with every passing moment.

There stood the man right next to him who they called Messiah. They wanted him crucified. Pilate wasn’t helpless then, but was confused. That was a new feeling for him. Being the Governor he was usually clear on his decisions. But it was different this time. His conscience seemed to be troubling him a lot. Decisions appeared hazy. But the mob kept pushing him to the wall against his will.

He was about to make up his mind when the note arrived. It was quite unusual for Claudia to interrupt him in between a trial. He knew it must be that important. What he read made him realize even more, but didn’t help ease the situation. On the contrary it added to the gravity. "Don't have anything to do with that innocent man, for I have suffered a great deal today in a dream because of him."

If there was one man who could free the accused, it was him. He was the last word now, since Herod also sent the man back. It was a fight between honesty and power. He didn’t want to upset the sentiments of the mob and always preferred to portray himself as a pro-Empire man. The accused meant nothing to him, compared to the throne he will stand to lose if the decision was to free him. He crumbled the note from Claudia and his conscience died along with that.

There was only one thing left. He ordered for a washing bowl, took water and washed his hands in front of the crowd. "I am innocent of this man's blood," he said. "It is your responsibility!" The verdict was given.

His thoughts were interrupted by a messenger. The man had a grave face. Pilate had been summoned to the inner chamber where he could see Claudia lying down. She no longer was in pain. He looked around for the baby. The midwife was trembling while trying to wash her hands covered in blood. One look at her face and Pilate knew something terrible happened!

She kneeled down in front of him and pleaded for mercy. The baby couldn’t be saved.

That was the moment when the train of thoughts that got interrupted earlier, returned to him.

All the people answered, "Let his blood be on us and on our children!"

Katie’s Mystery

She was welcomed home with a cry of joy! The round little eyes seem to have sparkled when the entire family greeted her as soon as she stepped in. She was truly delighted and was literally flying high!

Katie, that’s what the family decided to name her. Dad, mom and the two little ones in the family were all excited to welcome the third child into the family! She was a born charmer and carried herself with an air of power that held her together. Katie was such an active creature that she was seen all around the house. One moment she’ll be seen hiding behind the curtains in the hall; a few moments later she’ll be hanging besides the kitchen door. She loved to float around and enjoyed the attention everyone bestowed on her.

She was the precious jewel of the family who had this uncanny ability to make everyone filled with happiness! All went well till one day when the little boy of the family noticed something strange about Katie’s legs. They seemed to be losing its strength. The girl appeared to be losing weight from one of her legs! They tried every possible cure that can be given in the world to her. But soon, things went from bad to worse. Katie’s second leg also started appearing malnourished.

None of the medicines seem to have an effect on the little girl. Sadly enough in another few days the mysterious illness got into her arms as well, first affecting her left hand and later the right. They all prayed for a miracle which is all what was left to do for them.

Katie survived for a few more days. With each passing day her body became weaker and weaker. On that fateful day as everyone in the family gathered for an evening prayer, they could see Katie with droopy eyes and a very fragile body looking at the picture of God as if she was receiving her last rites. Soon she slowly descended and let herself lie near the prayer mat.

The little ones in the family tried to lift her up and place her on their lap. All what they heard was a gasp. It was the last bit of air that was left in the helium balloon in the shape of a girl. Ten days back dad was holding the thread while bringing her home from the carnival ground.

RIP Katie.

A dad’s dilemma!

It was bedtime again the other day. Our son had slept off already and our four year old girl was on the bed, but as usual resisting sleep big time with her condition yet to be met that Amma (mom) needs to cuddle and be with her till she sleeps!

Here is exactly how the conversation went between mom (M) and daughter (D):

M: Why don’t you sleep dear? Amma needs to finish something.

D: No! I need you here next to me.

M: Wait, let me ask Appa (Dad) to come and join you.

D: No, I want you.

M: Oh, so you don’t want to cuddle Appa and sleep?

D: No, I want to sleep only with you.

M: Shall we then send Appa away?

D: What?! Send Appa away? No!

M: Why not?

D: Of course not! Because he is our Appa!

My heart was filled with all the love this sweet little world could offer! But soon came the remaining part of her statement.

D: Who will then drive us around?

Dedicated to all the loving dads around the world!

The Second Chance

‘Ayyappanum Koshiyum’ is a recent Malayalam movie that got released starring Prithviraj Sukumaran and Biju Menon. Soon after the movie got released, a controversy started doing rounds about one of the scenes in the movie. This is the scene where Koshi, the character played by Prithviraj slaps his wife.

Later when a journalist questioned Prithvi on him going back on an earlier promise he made, of never acting in scenes that are outrageous to a woman, he made a very interesting remark. He mentioned that this was the only way to factually represent a problem that exists in our society today even when the parties involved are highly educated. What was even more fascinating was the statement that followed. He said ‘Kannamma’ the character who is the wife of ‘Ayyappan’ hailing from a lesser educated background would’ve walked out of the marriage if it ever happened to her.

You might have guessed where I’m heading to, with this narration. If the guess is that I’ll be touching upon the importance of giving due respect to the women, then guess again! It isn’t that the topic is less important. On the contrary it is one of the most critical topics to be discussed in any forum that talks about relationships. But enough and more has been said about it. Hence I want to focus on the possibility of a second chance each one is capable of giving the other in a relationship.

How often have you ended up in a situation where you misbehaved with your partner to an extent that you made him or her feel that it is not worth living with you anymore? The affected party in such situations have two options ahead. The easier option will be to decide that your partner is not worth to share your life with even for another day. Quite a few take this decision and find the ‘easy way out’ of the relationship. But I really want to talk about the others who take up the more challenging option and lead themselves as well as their partner to a more meaningful life in future.

Option two is where you give a second chance to the one who inflicted pain in you. Definitions can be very relative when it comes to severity of mistakes committed to you by your partner. A slap on a face could be an unpardonable offence for someone whereas for others it is pardonable once if they see hope at the end of the tunnel.

Most of the couples in their early years of relationship are truly in a state of ignorance about each other. You will really know someone only when you start sharing the same roof. This state of ignorance, especially during the initial days, leads to behaviours that may easily be misunderstood as non-compatibility by both parties. This is where a second chance stands crucial. It is absolutely essential to realize that these initial misunderstandings, if amicably resolved on time, will lead to something very beautiful.

Still doubtful? Ask this question to any of your loved ones who had been married for a few years. During the initial years of marriage were there incidents that made them believe that they had to call it quits? Ask them if they could even imagine taking the first option and if so what would’ve happened? I am pretty sure the answer will be all the beautiful moments they experienced together as a couple till date happened only because either of them gave a second chance to the other.

Giving a second chance to your partner isn’t a bad thing but it is equally important that the recipient learns to respect this decision. It requires mutual effort to ensure that the second chance is utilized in its right spirit and more importantly understand that there isn’t a third chance!

May you have the grace to provide a second chance to a loved one, if required and the ability to accept the fact that you are now given an opportunity to make things better! 

Battery Low

‘A real pervert you have become!’

Tony could scoop the sarcasm out of Ann’s voice. ‘Who gave you the license to talk all these nonsense?’ He could easily make out the pseudo seriousness she added to her tone.

‘Your dad and mom, precisely three months back!’ He said. That was when their wedding was officially fixed in the traditional Central Travancore way in Kerala where the culture of arranged marriage still exists at large among the Catholic community. Three months since that lovely day, Tony was on his way from Bangalore, where he worked, to Kottayam, his home. He counted the number of times they met in between. It was exactly eight times and this trip will be his ninth, his lucky number! Two days later they’ll be a couple, officially engaged.

‘This seat is so uncomfortable’, he started complaining. He was seated on the left side towards the back row.

Ann couldn’t hold back her discontent. ‘You truly deserve it! How many times did I remind you last month to book the train tickets? The lazy bum you are. Finally ended up on a State Transport. Now better shut up and enjoy the bus ride.’

He was miffed, but all what he said was, ‘I can see an empty seat behind the driver. Let me check if I could shift there.’  Beep… Beep... Tony saw the alert for low battery. ‘This thing may get switched off soon.’ He told her.

‘Can’t you charge the phone in the bus?’ There was a silence for a while. ‘Hello… Tony, can you hear me?’

‘I forgot the charger.’ That was all what he could manage to say. Silence spoke for her. He didn’t want to provoke her any further and so while shifting to the front seat he quickly changed the topic.

‘Did you think of the destination yet? I’ve told you I’m not into beaches. Why don’t we look at some of the hill stations? It’ll be awesome with the winter chill and a perfect setting for a honeymoon trip.’ Three months were more than enough for them to realize that they were designed quite differently. But somehow they managed to find a middle line.

Decision making came naturally to Ann. ‘Let us settle on Mauritius. You’ll get your mountains and I can enjoy the beaches as well’. By now, Tony had started to develop the skill to differentiate between the arguments he at least has a scope to win and others where he stood no chance. This was a classic case for latter. He conceded without much debate. There was a hidden agenda as well. She agreed to do all the planning and he was super happy that he doesn’t have to break his head for the trip. The fact is she didn’t trust him with the bookings, just the way he goofed up the train booking and ended up travelling on a bus which they both disliked.

Half way through the trip, the bus stopped for dinner. The battery icon lost all its charm and was reduced to a delicate single bar. The conversation continued. She was still confused about deciding on a wedding gown as against a saree. He tried to make informed suggestions, but ended up doing a pathetic job. Attires planning was never his strength. 

Soon after bus left Salem border everyone in the bus was in a deep sleep except for the one soul who was having an awesome time with his sweetheart. The time in between a wedding fixing and actual tying of the knot is purely magical.

‘Hey, you never said anything about meeting tomorrow?’ Tony was getting quite impatient. He could hear her chuckle at the other end of the phone and it was promptly followed by one of the final alerts from the phone announcing a critically low battery.

‘I’m really sorry, Appachan said no more meetings till the engagement is over’. As soon as she said this, his face turned a deep crimson red which could be seen in the blue light of the phone even in the darkness inside the bus.

‘For God’s sake we are in the 21^st century! When will these ever change?’

While Ann could feel his frustration, she almost half wittingly enjoyed the moment since these will never come back to life once they are pronounced man and wife a couple of months from now.

‘Patience dear, patience. Learn to appreciate the value of waiting. I can assure you that the wait will be worth it.’ A mischievous smile found its place on her face as she finished the statement.

Tony lost it and snapped, ‘Your trash can, that’s exactly where this philosophy should rest. I’m going to come over to your place tomorrow, you better be ready’.

‘Tony no! Let us not make a scene at home. You know how much I love to be with you, but this probably is one last time I’ll have to be daddy’s girl’. She pleaded.

‘I’m going to hang up’ Tony was furious and he almost banged the phone to the seat.

That’s exactly when the last bar from the battery icon disappeared and the cabin became completely dark. Ann barely heard his last words but she was sure she heard a loud thud and heard Tony screaming.

Beep... Beep… Beep… The call got disconnected. She tried dialling him. ‘The number you are trying to reach is either switched off or not reachable’. She hit the bed with a smile and soon was in a deep sleep. The beautiful emerald green waters of Mauritius slowly started filling her dreams.

She was up a little late in the morning. She knew that he wouldn’t call her. As always, she kept aside her ego, took her phone and called him. His phone was still switched off. ‘That’s strange’ she thought. ‘He should’ve reached home by now and charged his phone’.

As soon as she walked into the living room, saw the newspaper lying on the sofa. The heading read, “Truck crash into a KSRTC bus from Bangalore, 20 feared dead”.

She had a strange feeling. It felt exactly like the sand disappearing under your feet when the waves recede into the blue green waters of the ocean. 

The story in between...

It was bedtime. Our elder one being blessed with the ability of instant sleep was already half way through his slumber. The younger one had developed an insatiable appetite for bed time stories. This time she wanted to hear a story involving an animal.

I tucked her under the blanket and started telling her an adventure her appa was involved in, many years back. I told her about a visit to an uncle’s place at Koottikal, a beautiful hilly region in Kerala. There was a large rubber plantation there. At one of the corners of the estate there stood a cave which very few had explored till date.

It was a considerably big cave and I was all excited at the prospect of getting to explore a natural cave right in the middle of wilderness! As I was about to step into the cave, my cousin who was with us stopped me. There were certain sharp looking objects lying around the mouth of the cave. He carefully picked up one and showed us. It was a quill of a porcupine!

My four year old didn’t quite understand what a porcupine was and so she stopped me promptly there. It took a few minutes before I could make her understand what a porcupine is and how it uses its quills to attack its enemies.

I told her that the porcupine had gone away and we collected a few quills. By the time the narration reached this point, amma, her mom came back finishing her bath. It was time for me to go and shower. So amma took appa’s place with the offer that she will complete the story.

As I moved out of the room, I could hear my daughter tell her mom. “Amma, the porcupine just left. You continue with the story"! 

No Vs Know

We recently went on a vacation to a beach destination. The place we stayed was a lovely house situated right on top of a steep hill overlooking the lovely blue-green waters of Indian Ocean. After getting refreshed, we got out to explore the nearby places. Mia, our little one, was all excited that the steep slope down the hill was something she didn’t pay much attention to. She rushed to the slope and before we could even stop her, had a painful fall. It took a while for us to pacify her. But the fighter spirit in her didn’t let the fall drench the spirit of adventure and the trip went on to become a huge hit!

A few days later, we were back home from vacation and were walking to the parking lot to take the car out. There was a slope that led to the parking lot and Mia was running towards the car. Quite naturally I stopped her by saying, “Don’t you remember what happened during the trip? You’ll fall again”. She looked into my eyes and made a statement that literally left me with a profound thought. She said, “But Appa, I now know how to walk carefully on a slope.”

These are the times when your so-called wise brain gets a shock treatment from a tiny brain as little as a four year old one. It really sends an electrifying pulse to your brain that you have no choice but to sit and think about it. How many times have we stopped a dear one from doing something for the fear of them getting hurt? How many times have these resulted in them losing an opportunity to learn and overcome a fear factor? In fact our action of stopping someone from doing something due to our fear is in fact instilling fear in them as well. If they yield to our request, it is highly likely that they’ll never do that ever in their life, especially if this happens in their childhood.

I’m not generalising. I know quite a few people who have dared their loved ones to go beyond the comfort zones and get themselves experience what’s beyond usual. But if you are someone who set a limit to our dear ones, knowingly but at times unknowingly, we need to be aware that this results in them not getting moulded to overcome the challenges in life.

I remember a cousin brother of mine who was crazy about Navy that he got himself enrolled in a defence academy. One of the initial drills they had was being taken to the open sea on a naval ship. As soon as the ship reached the outer sea, they were asked to jump into the wild waters. Those who showed reluctance were mercilessly thrown into the sea and were left to experience how life will be for a Navy personnel.

While we do not necessarily have to be ruthless as the Navy, the question from my little one was a jolt for me to think differently. I realized the need to unlearn a few things I’ve been following. I really need to give my loved ones the space to learn and succeed than to stop them from doing something and be a perennial failure from not attempting the task.

The attitude becomes so positive when we let people ‘know’ something than saying ‘no’ to them which by nature is quite negative. Having said that, we need to make sure that we don’t cloud our common sense and let our loved ones go into dangers that are evident. The point is to realize the fact that we have a responsibility to make our dear ones experience certain aspects of life and not to deny them an opportunity to make their personalities better.

We all are what we are today, due to someone taking such decisions way back in the past. It could be our parents, teachers, siblings or friends who influenced us one way or other to either stop doing something or jump into and get the experience yourself.

Hence on this Valentines month, here is a warm wish to each one of us to extend our love to dear ones to let them experience what they rightfully should all the while keeping an eye on the boundary of risk by applying our common sense.