Thursday, August 19, 2010

Gifting a Blunder!

I had known my dad's cousin, for a few years, as the lady who chose to remain single amidst the traditional family she was part of. During family functions, she was a topic of discussion as the one who committed an act that is next to a cardinal sin! Though no one despised her at home, I always sensed a melancholic tone when people spoke about her.

Perennially our society has been one that strongly based itself upon the notion of matrimony for existence and procreation. Every child who is born into this system is raised with a constant reminder of the need for this age-old institution. This belief gets deep rooted so much that, anyone who dares to tread a path that is different is seen as an outcast. This nature of the public always remained a fascination right from the time I started decoding the algorithm of relationships in a family.

The chapters of my life flew by and one fine day I ended up at the doorsteps of the same lady. I was to stay there for a couple of months as part of completing my Post Graduation project in that city. My alternate agenda was to explore more on the psyche of a single woman on whom the society had attached a taboo.

Pages on the calendar were flipped twice and by that time I had my realization in place. I could figure out the discrimination, the so called civilization had shown on her. In fact I really admired her for resisting the act of bigotry for almost half a century! She was indeed happy being single and had no regrets whatsoever, unlike the concern people had for her. I could feel the sense of freedom she cherished and not to mention her own space she treasured!

Single or otherwise, maternal instincts form an inseparable part of the genetics that constitute the fairer sex. I experienced that with the care she extended towards my well being. I was truly thankful to her for making me comfortable during the couple of months I lived there. It was more like an eye-opener for me towards the definitions world had in store.

It was time to bid farewell to the wonderful camaraderie we shared. I thought of parting ways by gifting her something she valued. She being an avid reader, what else other than a book, could be the best gift? Hours were spent to fish out a befitting book that spoke volumes about living life to the fullest. Something that genuinely complimented her spirit of being single!

I got the book covered in a lovely gift wrapper and presented with a contented heart. Her naturally beautiful face glowed as I handed over the gift and soon enough she started unwrapping it. Till date I am not really sure of the sort of emotion that crossed her face, as she took a first look at the cover of the book!

It read, 'Who Will Cry When You Die?'

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

My Feminine Instincts

While recently filling an application form we came across an all familiar section for title. The options included Mr, Mrs & Ms. All the male folks out there, you are united by these forms regardless of the fact that you said 'I do'. The fairer sexes, you are yet to be recognized independently. You need the support of either your parents or husband, so the form says!

We say, as a country, we've become independent more than half a century back. The world has seen the empowerment of women in many ways than one. We've had Presidents, Business Heads and the Power Houses for multiple strata of society from the female species. Do we still need a differentiation between married and unmarried women?

The world speaks so much about men and women, the fairness of gender wherein one is no more superior to the other. One more generation passes and it shall be a non-existent scene, where parents worry about marrying off their daughters. Young women are breaking free themselves from the clutches of the societal norms that sketch their destiny for future. Those days will soon appear in the pages of History books when a girl stood in silence while her parents decided the groom for her.

The modern day women must realize that this separation of their gender based on the marital status is nothing but the age old British political strategy of Divide & Rule. Why do you need a separation when a man can be 'Mr' irrespective of the status? What makes the men privileged to have the unique identification? This is a true case of planned attempt to create an identity crisis among the gender that once used to be the bear-all category of society!

The bigger question will be why do women need a separate qualifier to address the presence or absence of the other half in their life? What difference does it make if a girl is married or otherwise? The taboo associated with an unmarried woman is again an evolved evil from the yester years of the present society. Why should you let that create a division?!

Many religions speak about God creating the human race with man and woman being equal. Of course, God as an entity being considered male, is a totally different debate altogether. The thought here is if we were created equally, at what course of history did that become less equal?

Equality should not remain only as a topic of discussion. It needs to be a way of life, among the thoughts shared, the challenges faced and the decisions taken. The moment you learn to respect your co-species and accept that they are as much a part of the environment, you inherited from the previous generation which makes you equally superior as the rest; the distinction will cease to exist.

Who does not love a peaceful world?!!

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